I’ve neglected my blog for a while. I should feel bad, but I don’t have time for that. My life is so full of distractions right now, I feel lucky to squeeze in any writing time on HellKat, let alone maintain my blog. Actually, I put HellKat aside for a few months while I reworked my first book, Keeper, and then republished it on July 4th. Okay, so some of my distractions are obviously of my own making. I didn’t have to rework and republish my first book. I just felt I could do it better. So, that recognition alone sent my brain in an obsessive loop I had to address in order to be able to progress with my current work in process. Yes, I can be my own worst enemy and create unnecessary work for myself. Trust me. It’s too late to change now.
And without warning, my family life is changing at a dizzying speed with my teenage son who is suddenly brandishing a Learner’s Permit. Where’d that come from? Wasn’t I just sending him to time-out and dropping him off at preschool last week? My son is the oldest, the first born, the test case, the guinea pig, the one who broke me in, made me a better mother, and made the road ahead smoother for his sister. Although if her eye rolling and deep sighs are any indication, I have a lot of room for improvement. But back to my reality and his driving: there’s nothing like your life flashing before your eyes to get your creative juices flowing, and your affairs in order. I tried my best not to look like the guy in the photo on the left the first time my son drove wild and free on our city streets. He did a good job, but that didn’t stop me from earning a few more gray hairs and pushing on my imaginary brakes like Fred Flintstone. Any parent who has handed over their car keys to a person whose diapers they once changed knows the feeling.
Add to this already bustling mix my job as an accountant with a company that has just transitioned their operating and accounting systems. Don’t get me wrong, I love change. Out with the old in with the new keeps my mind flexible and out of the deep ditch of mundane routine. It’s just that I thought I was almost at the point where I could switch to autopilot for a bit. I glimpsed an opening to finally get my head back into the story and characters in HellKat. But since I work from home, which has advantages and disadvantages, I know much of my time in the near future is going to be spent learning new software and procedures. See that’s the thing about working from home–I’m ALWAYS at work! It stares me in the face and taunts me like a playground bully until I put it out of my misery.
Then there’s my husband who still wants to spend time with me, even after knowing me for thirty-five years. Maybe he’s a glutton for punishment, or got kicked in the head by a horse as a kid… Anyway, we just got back from a wonderful distraction-filled vacation to San Francisco. We did it all: Fisherman’s Wharf, Alcatraz, Lombard Street, Muir Woods, Ghirardelli Square, wine country and even biked across the Golden Gate Bridge to Sausalito. Don’t know that I’ll revisit Fog City. It was a bit cold and windy for my liking; not to mention getting knocked off my bicycle by a rude biker trying to make room where there was none between me and the guardrail on that big, not-so-golden, windy bridge. And to think I could’ve been home writing instead of now feeling twice my age with scrapes, bruises, and a bit of a hitch in my step.
But that’s life: dealing with the distractions, the scrapes, the bruises, and the hitches along the way; and somehow knitting them all together, learning to enjoy the moments, the time I have right now. Instead of pining for the past or yearning for a future where I believe I’m going to be distraction free and finally able to do that ‘thing’ I want to do–whatever it is. Here’s the deal: it’s not going to happen. After almost fifty years, I’ve learned that life is short, that there will never be enough time, and that distractions are a good thing, because that’s when life happens. Distractions keep me from wasting too much time worrying about the future, and instead keep me present, keep me awake, and keep me interested in what’s coming next. After all, I’ll have plenty of distraction-free time when my ashes are blowing in the wind.
So, here’s the deal: HellKat may or may not be released in 2014. It depends on the coming distractions. I’ll keep you posted. Also, I’m going to do my best to pay more attention to my blog, review more books, surprise you with a teaser or two from HellKat, and along the way spotlight some indie authors I enjoy. And I’ll let you know if I’ve eased up on my Fred Flintstone brakes in time to give ‘em a rest before my daughter’s behind the wheel rolling her eyes and honking the horn at me.
However, if none of that happens, you’ll now know why: I’m enjoying all the distractions life has to offer…while I’m lucky enough to have the time.